Established in 1973
An Ask Jeeves search yields this nugget about Mr. Bessler: “Andrew started designing websites professionally before ‘web designer’ was a real job title.”
Frankly, that sounds like a polite way of saying the guy is older than a rotory telephone. You laugh all you want, but how‘s that flawless reception on AT&T’s mobile network workin’ out for ya? Anyway, here’s what else
Magnum P.I. was able to dig-up about this jerk:
- He grew-up religiously-playing Microleague Baseball on an Apple //e;
- Mastered PrintShop, MacPaint, and then the mind-blowingly-super SuperPaint; owned both a ThunderScan and a LightningScan; next-up were Pagemaker, Freehand, and Quark; followed by two extremely-obscure pieces of software called Photoshop and Illustrator;
- Designed his first “WWW site” during college in the mid-‘90s;
- Taught-himself HTML out of necessity and designed/built web stuff for a living in the dial-up era;
- He once attempted to teach the basics of HTML to a group of MSI Insurance agents (keyword = “attempted”);
- Has worked as a print and web designer for over two decades now;
- He occasionally “borrows” a parking spot from the folks at Bust Out;
- He enjoys consuming Korean food and oxygen.
Frankly, that sounds like a polite way of saying the guy is older than a rotory telephone. You laugh all you want, but how‘s that flawless reception on AT&T’s mobile network workin’ out for ya? Anyway, here’s what else Magnum P.I. was able to dig-up about this jerk:
Inset illustration: An artist-rendering of Mr. Bessler with thick, luxurious hair (circa 1999). His blissful expression surely the result of watching Mr. Belvedere and Webster for 17-straight hours—thanks to his vast archive of VHS cassettes.
This beige contraption was recently unearthed from his basement—a further illustration of Mr. Bessler’s hilariously-advanced age.
